


Morning Breath

by ShibaScarf



Category: Homestuck
Genre: F/M, Implied/Referenced Underage Drinking, so this is old as heck whoops, wrote this before roxy had quit drinking
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-08
Updated: 2015-06-08
Packaged: 2018-04-03 11:59:24
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,019
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4100161
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ShibaScarf/pseuds/ShibaScarf
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It would be one thing to have made out with people that already sort of knew that she liked them.  It’s another thing to make out with the guy that she actually secretly wanted to marry on the astral plane and have a gajillion dorky babies with.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Morning Breath

**Author's Note:**

> This is a really old fic, so apologies for the details that are now non-canon, like Roxy drinking or the concept that booze wasn't ever alchemized on the meteor. I'm seriously that old of a John/Roxy shipper so whoops.

                Roxy wakes up to find herself with the worst hangover possible.  For a moment, she lies in misery and clutches at the sheets beneath her.  They’re not her sheets, she begins to realize; they’re softer and a little fuzzy, like worn out terrycloth.  Eyes still screwed shut, she tries to remember where she is and why she’s hungover.

                She begins with a sluggish mental checklist of her personal state.  Shoes? No.  Pants? Yes… But shirt, no!  Wait… Bra, yes.  She had been drinking, that much is clear. 

                Slowly, the memory unfurls.  She had just figured out how to alchemize herself some booze yesterday afternoon.  And that deserved a party…  So she had enlisted Dirk and Dave to play music…  And Terezi to help decorate…  And invited everyone else to come have fun with her…

                The memory ends there.  Roxy groans in frustration, and to her surprise, hears something or someone in the room moving in response.  Most likely the owner of this bed, she reasons.  She rolls onto her side and blearily opens one eye.

                John Egbert stares back at her from his seat on the floor.  Roxy opens her other eye and blinks down at him.  He’s sitting in a pile of blankets on the floor.  A make-shift bed, she supposes.  Seeing as how she’s in his.  His hair is mussed, one side crushed down and the other sticking out wildly.  He fiddles with his glasses nervously.  God, he’s adorable.

                “Morning,” Roxy manages to say, and her mouth isn’t as fuzzy as it could be.  She curls up, hugging her knees to her chest and pulling John’s sheets tighter around her.  They have little ghosts on them.  “I’m in your bed.”

                “Yeah,” John says, the words blurting and tumbling out of his mouth like they always do.  Roxy takes the time to quietly appreciate the funny rhythm of his speech.  “I mean, I hope that’s okay.  I didn’t want to leave you by yourself.  In health class, they always said that you can puke in your sleep and die, and that’s a really awful way to go.  So.  I guess I just wanted to make sure you didn’t puke and die.”

                “You’re sweet,” Roxy tells him.  She sits up, and then tugs the sheets around her when Egbert blushes furiously at the sight of her bra.  “So, what’s the damage?  Did I make a complete ass of myself last night?  Drunken antics?  Hilarious stories that will haunt me the rest of my life?  Sloppy make-outs?”

                John blushes furiously at the last one and pointedly looks away.  Oh dear.  Roxy tries to think of who it could have been. 

                “Ah, bingo,” she says.  “Okay, lay it on me, Egbert. I’m a big girl, I can take it.  Was it Dirk?”

                John shakes his head, and looks back at her.  “You don’t remember?” he asks.

                “No,” Roxy says, letting one hand slip from out of the sheet to worry at her lip.  “Okay… Not Dirk.  And not Jake either?” John shakes his head.  “Um… Gonna need some hints here, Eggie.”

                “Okay, um,” John looks away again.  “The person is in this room.”

                Roxy sits up a little taller and does a quick sweep of the room.  She doesn’t see anyone.  She shuffles to the end of the bed and leans over to check underneath.  Nothing but dust bunnies and… ooh, some magazines shoved to the back against the wall.  Roxy lifts her head up to waggle her eyebrows at John and forgets that she’s tipped over the side of the bed.  She loses her balance and slides to the floor, feet still resting on the bed.  She feels like a seal.

                “Bark bark,” she says dully.  John laughs nervously.  With no small difficulty, Roxy rearranges herself to sit on the floor, sheet still haphazardly draped across her shoulders.

                “It wasn’t a trick,” John says, reaching out to fix Roxy’s sheet covering.  “It was me.  You tried to make out with me.”

                “Tried to?” Roxy repeats, swallowing hard.  Shoot.  It would be one thing to have made out with people that already sort of knew that she liked them.  It’s another thing to make out with the guy that she actually secretly wanted to marry on the astral plane and have a gajillion dorky babies with.  Or tried to make out with.  “Meaning, you turned me down, then?”

                “Well, yeah,” John says, his voice trailing off awkwardly.  Now it’s Roxy’s turn to ramble.

                 “Oh, well,” she says, and the nervous giggling is working its way up her throat.  “I mean, of course!  I was really drunk and probably really gross last night, and I’m totally not your type.  And, it was prolly just the booze talking, cuz it’s not like I would ever-  Or you would ever-“ She shuts her jaw with an audible click and hides her face in her hands.  “Open mouth, insert foot.”

                “It wasn’t like that,” John says suddenly.  Roxy sneaks a quick glance at him.  He’s twisting his hands in the blankets underneath him, looking down at nothing in particular.  “I mean, you were really drunk.  But you said all these nice things, and I felt really bad about it.”  He looks up now, mouth screwed to one side as he thinks of how to phrase his words.  “It’s not gentlemanly to take advantage of a lady when she’s been drinking,” he says finally.

                “Oh,” Roxy says softly.   He grins shyly at her, and she sits up on her knees and scoots closer.  “So, what you’re saying is… Now that I’m sober….  You would engage in the sloppiest of makeouts with me?”  Their mouths are inches apart now.

                “Well, no,” John says, leaning back and smirking.  Roxy’s heart drops.  “I mean, you do have like, the worst morning breath in the history of ever.”  His prankster gambit pings triumphantly.

                “EGBERT,” Roxy hisses, and she gives him the most vicious noogie ever imposed upon a man’s head.

                He squirms out of her grasp, doubling over in laughter.  Roxy is gonna give him the biggest smooch.

                Right after she finds a shirt and brushes her teeth, that is.


End file.
